2026 Sixth Form Commencement Speech by Alex Siano '26

This speech is dedicated to my advisor, Mr. Del Valle. Coach, without question, you have had the greatest impact on me at Millbrook, and I thank you for putting up with me over the past four years. 

On that note, good morning everyone, and thank you for being here today. This speech includes an extensive amount of self-deprecation. So, to those of you who don't like me, which might be a fair number of you, don't worry, you will get what you want. But first, I would like to start with a little self-indulgence and a few appreciations.

First, to the bald guy in the fancy suit sitting right over there...Dad, I appreciate everything you've done for me, and I sincerely hope I've made you and Mom proud.

To the Class of 2026, I hope to give you all a speech you can be proud of, a speech you wanted to hear. To those of you who did not vote for me, specifically those who asked Mr. Downs to prevent me from being up here, sorry, I guess. And to Mr. Downs, thank you for not listening to them. To be honest, I am still very surprised you are letting me do this. 

And last, but certainly not least, I’d like to thank the faculty members, and one in particular: Diane Dalton. Every chair you're sitting in, every stake in this tent, and every diploma being handed out today are all products of Ms. Dalton's work in putting this together. She does this without any intention of being appreciated, just like so many of you do. So to Ms. Dalton and the rest of the faculty, thank you for everything you've done for us. 

 

When word spread that I was to be class speaker, I was confronted by John B., the dining hall pizza guy, who was, to say the least, surprised by this class's selection. With a smile on his face, he asked me, “Wait a minute, dude, aren't you kind of a troll?” To answer your question, John B., YES, I AM A TROLL!! I do not mean I look like a troll, although many women have described me this way. I mean the Urban Dictionary’s definition of a troll: a person who deliberately says provocative things by finding the worst in situations and expressing them to create maximum disruption and argument. A muckraker, a provocateur. So, with that in mind, allow me to explain my experience here in true troll fashion.

I came to Millbrook a year and a half after my mother, Kristin, passed away from a seven-year battle with breast cancer. She was a boarding school graduate herself and was so passionate about the experience that she had helped my brother Mike, Class of 2023, with applications until the week before she died. She was a former journalist on Capitol Hill, with a healthy skepticism about her. And this trait was passed down to me from the moment I was born. One trait that did NOT immediately pass down to me was her fear of confrontation. When she was surrounded by people she didn't like, she had a strategy. She would often tell her sons, "Just smile and nod."

In the years after her death, that healthy skepticism present in me turned unhealthy. I began not only to look for the bad in every situation, but to expect it. While this trait has served me well in some ways, it has greatly impacted my experience at Millbrook, a place where finding fault has never seemed easier.

I became known as an “angry old man” according to Dr. K., and a “raging cynic” according to Ms. Clizbe. I let myself become angry about all the things I couldn’t control. Things I couldn't change as a high school student. 

I couldn't control double standards about dress code, disciplinary actions, and special privileges, while I was berated for things like the type of cuff on my pants and watched as adults enforced rules only on those they pleased. I couldn't control social cliques developing amongst our community, thanks to said double standards, which led people to badmouth each other, teammates to fight with one another, and so many toxic relationships.

I couldn't control other people or their actions, but I was mad nonetheless.

For years, I thought my anger was misplaced. I thought it couldn't have been more than a defensive mechanism, a sign that I still wasn't healed from my loss. However, in the last month of the school year, when I became class speaker, I realized many of my classmates felt the same way I did. I speak for so many of us on these issues, and that is exactly why I was elected as speaker: I am not afraid of being called a troll if it means bridging the gap between our students and faculty. 

To those of you who shared your thoughts about the double standards and the social divides I just mentioned, I'm sorry, and I hear you. These need to change, and they need to change now. But allow me to use my experience, and my mother’s advice, to explain why these difficult moments may be part of what makes Millbrook such a valuable place.

Maybe the frustrations we have felt here are the very things that have prepared us for the next chapter. The world is filled with challenge, pain, and heartbreak. And knowing that, we can be grateful, because Millbrook prepares us to deal with those problems in a safe place. There will always be something to be angry about, but controlling what you can control is: A, the only thing we can do, and B, the lesson Millbrook is trying to teach us. As my Mom always used to say: “Smile and nod.”

Smile at the people who don't like you in this community and make fun of you for not fitting in with their group. Look inward, find the values that are important to you, and search for friends who appreciate you for who you are. Smile because you now know how to live, work, and be around people from across the world with different views and experiences. 

Think of all the people here in this community you interact with daily, people you would have no connection to, and yet people you still work, eat, and live with. Think of how much more prepared you will be when you have to work on a project with someone from across the world. 

Nod at those who force double standards on this community, those who are responsible for our divisions, and those who only enforce rules when they see fit. Nod at them because life is filled with bias, prejudice, and hypocrisy, and it is your job to live true to yourself anyway. 

Think of all the adults here whom you may not like or may like, and how you've navigated those relationships. Now, think of how much more prepared you will be for future bosses and co-workers, some of whom you will like, and some of whom you won't. 

As Mom would say: Smile and nod. 

These moments that have bothered you all and me are exactly the things that teach us to control what we can control and focus on ourselves. Life is going to make you uncomfortable. Life is going to stress you out. You are supposed to realize that not everyone will like you, not every system will be fair, and not every effort will be rewarded. I mean, heck, I was on the honor roll and Ms. Clarke didn't read my name last night!!!

No place is perfect, and we should not expect it to be. No matter where we go, there will be flaws and things that do not go our way. Everywhere we go, we will be frustrated and let down, no matter how great we perceive a situation might be. But this is my point. 

I wanted Millbrook to be a place with no flaws or issues. I wanted it to be perfect, and when it wasn't, I unfairly deemed it a bad experience. So how can I call a place great if it still has flaws? The answer is that Millbrook has been great because it has taught us real lessons in a safe environment. 

Think of all the ridiculous infractions you have received over your time. All the detentions you had to sit through, for some, the suspensions you had to learn from. As you sit here about to graduate, think of how forgiving Millbrook is compared to the real world. There are no Disciplinary Committees or accountability hearings to support you if you fall behind out there. If you don't do what you need to do in a real job, you just get fired.  

Appreciate this if nothing else: this is a place where failure hurts, but it doesn’t destroy us. Millbrook gives us a place to fall, struggle, and learn, while still knowing we have the chance to get back up. Millbrook is far from perfect, but it is still very special.

 

As I conclude my time here, I look back with great appreciation for this school and the lessons I have learned as a four-year senior. So few kids in the United States get to enjoy a boarding school experience, and I encourage all of you to have gratitude, because I believe in my heart of hearts that not only have we gotten that, but we have done so at the best institution out there. This place challenged us, frustrated us, pushed us, and as a result, prepared us. 

We are prepared for the next chapter of our lives. We leave here not just with diplomas, but with the understanding that life will always bring things we cannot control. So, smile and nod. Smile and nod at the good and the bad. Smile and nod at those you leave behind here, because our time has come to an end, and we are ready for what comes next. Thank you, classmates, thank you, Dad, thank you, Mom, thank you, Millbrook.