Drew Casertano's Remarks at the Installation of Paul J. Stellato as Head of School, Princeton Day School
Let us now speak of Paul Joseph Stellato...
First though, let us remember that behind every good man, there is a great woman. In this case, three: Maureen, Kate, and Lauren.
It was my privilege and my pleasure to have Maureen as a colleague at Millbrook School for eleven years. I asked her to do everything from head our largest dormitory of upper-class girls to coach girls’ varsity tennis to serve as an adviser to six students to run the annual fund. She did it all and she did it well – exceptionally well.
Kate and our middle son, Tyler, were classmates from grades five through eight at Indian Mountain School, a K-9 independent day and boarding school in Lakeville, CT. My wife, Linda, was director of development at Indian Mountain at the time and for four years she drove Kate and Tyler and the rest of the car pool to school each and every morning. Through those morning rides, Linda and Kate came to know each other as only a car pool driving mom and a middle school aged passenger can. Linda and I are grateful that Paul and Maureen entrusted Kate to us and to our Millbrook colleagues as a boarding student when they moved to Roanoke just after her ninth grade year. We’re so very proud to count her as a Millbrook graduate.
Lauren and our youngest son, Will, started nursery school together. However, she left Millbrook with her parents at the age of ten and before we came to know her well. Still, we’ve kept tabs on her through her fac brat friends at Millbrook and, of course, via her parents’ tales. Clearly, Lauren, you are your father’s daughter and one of the three great women behind the new head of Princeton Day School.
Now, back to Paul, or Mr. Stellato as he will be known to most of you. In particular, let me offer a hint of what you can expect of him, with a smattering of suggestions of what you can do for him.
Mr. Stellato loves school. He’s gone back to school every September since 1961. He thrives on the activity of school: the relationships, the energy, and most of all, the learning and growth.
Paul Stellato knows schools. He has worked at a variety of them, both day and boarding: Albany Academy, Blair, Williston Northampton and, of course, Millbrook and North Cross. And he has excelled in a range of roles at these schools. At Millbrook, he was a master teacher of English. He then became an outstanding director of college counseling, after which he was an equally successful dean of faculty and assistant headmaster.
After his family, his top priority will always be the students of Princeton Day School – all 900 of you. He will work hard, very hard, on your behalf. And he will expect that you will share his work ethic.
Here let me opine for a moment about the role of a school head. Recently, I’ve heard it said that a head of school should be a business person and that an MBA would be a better course of study than the customary graduate degree in an academic field or in education or from a seminary. I couldn’t disagree more. If a school is a business, its business is to educate the minds and hearts, the intellect and character, of its students to prepare them to succeed and to serve in their educations and beyond. While a school head must have business-like skills, at his core, he is an intellectual and moral leader.
Which brings me back, once more, to Mr. Stellato, the very school leader that I just described.
The man is a clothes horse. He loves to dress and you can bet that he used this move and his new position to augment his wardrobe substantially. J. Press is his favored tailor. Two button jackets with a center vent his preferred uniform. I bet that he is sporting a new outfit today. And flattery just might get you somewhere when it comes to his style.
Listen carefully to Mr. Stellato for he will tell you what you need to hear, even when you don’t want to hear it - especially when you don’t want to hear it. Though he will speak with sensitivity and skill, he will resort to candor and directness if you aren’t hearing him. Always, his motives will be to help - you, your child, or the school in general.
Mr. Stellato loves golf. Like me, he wishes that he could play it more and play it better. When asking Mr. Stellato for something, you might do well to time it to coincide with the completion of a good round.
Mr. Stellato knows that the work of educating our children from the elementary years through high school is serious business done by talented and dedicated people. He understands that it is a complex and sometimes mystifying process that requires vision, deep commitment, tough love, patience, faith, sound judgment and good instincts of him. Above all, he appreciates that a sense of humor is a vital ingredient in his work. To support him well you, colleagues and parents especially, must understand this too.
A brief story about the legendary Frank Boyden, headmaster of Deerfield Academy from 1912 – 1968, may illustrate.
This story was told to me by the protagonist, a Deerfield graduate from the late 50’s. In the spring of his senior, this young man, who had been admitted to Stanford, decided to sneak off campus to visit a friend at a nearby school. The friend was a young lady and I can’t recall if she was at Stoneleigh Burnham or Smith College. Either way, our hero had miles to travel to and from his destination.
By the time he returned to DA, it was known by Mr. Boyden and other campus authorities that the senior had left campus without permission. His punishment? Suspension? Expulsion? Much to the contrary, Mr. Boyden declared to the senior and to his parents that his actions indicated that he was not sufficiently mature to attend college in the fall. Instead, the young man would return to Deerfield for a fifth year of high school and would re-apply to college. He and his parents accepted the consequences without argument; he did well in that second senior year; he was re-admitted to Stanford; and he graduated believing that he had taken his lumps and was the better for it.
May Paul Stellato enjoy a measure of the trust in his authority and wisdom that Mr. Boyden experienced in his day. He will need that for all of you to benefit fully from his significant energy and substantial abilities.
To Treby Williams, all members of the search committee and the board of trustees, I offer my heartfelt congratulations on bringing Paul and Maureen and their daughters to your outstanding school.
Thanks to your excellent judgment and to all the hard work that has gone into the success of your recent campaign, it is safe to say the Princeton Day School has never been stronger and that its future never brighter.
To our good friends, the Stellatos, and to all involved with PDS, we wish you Godspeed and all the best.
Back
It was my privilege and my pleasure to have Maureen as a colleague at Millbrook School for eleven years. I asked her to do everything from head our largest dormitory of upper-class girls to coach girls’ varsity tennis to serve as an adviser to six students to run the annual fund. She did it all and she did it well – exceptionally well.
Kate and our middle son, Tyler, were classmates from grades five through eight at Indian Mountain School, a K-9 independent day and boarding school in Lakeville, CT. My wife, Linda, was director of development at Indian Mountain at the time and for four years she drove Kate and Tyler and the rest of the car pool to school each and every morning. Through those morning rides, Linda and Kate came to know each other as only a car pool driving mom and a middle school aged passenger can. Linda and I are grateful that Paul and Maureen entrusted Kate to us and to our Millbrook colleagues as a boarding student when they moved to Roanoke just after her ninth grade year. We’re so very proud to count her as a Millbrook graduate.
Lauren and our youngest son, Will, started nursery school together. However, she left Millbrook with her parents at the age of ten and before we came to know her well. Still, we’ve kept tabs on her through her fac brat friends at Millbrook and, of course, via her parents’ tales. Clearly, Lauren, you are your father’s daughter and one of the three great women behind the new head of Princeton Day School.
Now, back to Paul, or Mr. Stellato as he will be known to most of you. In particular, let me offer a hint of what you can expect of him, with a smattering of suggestions of what you can do for him.
Mr. Stellato loves school. He’s gone back to school every September since 1961. He thrives on the activity of school: the relationships, the energy, and most of all, the learning and growth.
Paul Stellato knows schools. He has worked at a variety of them, both day and boarding: Albany Academy, Blair, Williston Northampton and, of course, Millbrook and North Cross. And he has excelled in a range of roles at these schools. At Millbrook, he was a master teacher of English. He then became an outstanding director of college counseling, after which he was an equally successful dean of faculty and assistant headmaster.
After his family, his top priority will always be the students of Princeton Day School – all 900 of you. He will work hard, very hard, on your behalf. And he will expect that you will share his work ethic.
Here let me opine for a moment about the role of a school head. Recently, I’ve heard it said that a head of school should be a business person and that an MBA would be a better course of study than the customary graduate degree in an academic field or in education or from a seminary. I couldn’t disagree more. If a school is a business, its business is to educate the minds and hearts, the intellect and character, of its students to prepare them to succeed and to serve in their educations and beyond. While a school head must have business-like skills, at his core, he is an intellectual and moral leader.
Which brings me back, once more, to Mr. Stellato, the very school leader that I just described.
The man is a clothes horse. He loves to dress and you can bet that he used this move and his new position to augment his wardrobe substantially. J. Press is his favored tailor. Two button jackets with a center vent his preferred uniform. I bet that he is sporting a new outfit today. And flattery just might get you somewhere when it comes to his style.
Listen carefully to Mr. Stellato for he will tell you what you need to hear, even when you don’t want to hear it - especially when you don’t want to hear it. Though he will speak with sensitivity and skill, he will resort to candor and directness if you aren’t hearing him. Always, his motives will be to help - you, your child, or the school in general.
Mr. Stellato loves golf. Like me, he wishes that he could play it more and play it better. When asking Mr. Stellato for something, you might do well to time it to coincide with the completion of a good round.
Mr. Stellato knows that the work of educating our children from the elementary years through high school is serious business done by talented and dedicated people. He understands that it is a complex and sometimes mystifying process that requires vision, deep commitment, tough love, patience, faith, sound judgment and good instincts of him. Above all, he appreciates that a sense of humor is a vital ingredient in his work. To support him well you, colleagues and parents especially, must understand this too.
A brief story about the legendary Frank Boyden, headmaster of Deerfield Academy from 1912 – 1968, may illustrate.
This story was told to me by the protagonist, a Deerfield graduate from the late 50’s. In the spring of his senior, this young man, who had been admitted to Stanford, decided to sneak off campus to visit a friend at a nearby school. The friend was a young lady and I can’t recall if she was at Stoneleigh Burnham or Smith College. Either way, our hero had miles to travel to and from his destination.
By the time he returned to DA, it was known by Mr. Boyden and other campus authorities that the senior had left campus without permission. His punishment? Suspension? Expulsion? Much to the contrary, Mr. Boyden declared to the senior and to his parents that his actions indicated that he was not sufficiently mature to attend college in the fall. Instead, the young man would return to Deerfield for a fifth year of high school and would re-apply to college. He and his parents accepted the consequences without argument; he did well in that second senior year; he was re-admitted to Stanford; and he graduated believing that he had taken his lumps and was the better for it.
May Paul Stellato enjoy a measure of the trust in his authority and wisdom that Mr. Boyden experienced in his day. He will need that for all of you to benefit fully from his significant energy and substantial abilities.
To Treby Williams, all members of the search committee and the board of trustees, I offer my heartfelt congratulations on bringing Paul and Maureen and their daughters to your outstanding school.
Thanks to your excellent judgment and to all the hard work that has gone into the success of your recent campaign, it is safe to say the Princeton Day School has never been stronger and that its future never brighter.
To our good friends, the Stellatos, and to all involved with PDS, we wish you Godspeed and all the best.
